Principled Leadership, Morale, Resilience, Suicide Prevention ©
PART I of II
On Thursday, November 14, 2024, I was the privileged guest speaker for the NYPD Medical Division at their Corona, Queens facility.
My remarks were made possible due to the leadership of former NYPD Police Commissioner Thomas G. Donlon.
The event was coordinated by the NYPD Chief Supervising Surgeon Eli J. Kleinman, M.D., M.P.H.
I am deeply grateful to Commissioner Donlon for making the event possible, and to Dr. Kleinman for his kind introduction, hospitality, and professionalism.
The NYPD Police Self-Support Group
The attendees were members of the NYPD Police Self-Support Group (PSSG) and were profoundly inspirational.
Each introduced themselves prior to my presentation, sharing experiences of their personal line-of-duty injuries.
Their stories ignited a sense of respect, honor, and gratitude within my soul for their sacrifices.
These individuals represent the finest of all of us, and their experiences are a powerhouse of wisdom for every member of the NYPD, and for law enforcement nationwide.
The NYPD: Leading Through a National Crisis
My remarks were titled The NYPD: Leading Through a National Crisis ©.
The favorable feedback to my remarks led to the privileged appointment by the Police Commissioner in collaboration with numerous of his NYPD colleagues of Honorary Law Enforcement Motivational Speaker.
My remarks included the following:
- The challenging times for law enforcement throughout America, with alarming levels of stress, wounded morale, senseless acts of violence, and suicide.
- The NYPD is not immune to these challenges. Each of us must be catalysts of change to ignite a culture of respect, affirmation, and gratitude.
- The necessity of principled leadership, morale enhancement, emotional resilience, and suicide prevention.
- The paramount mandate of inspiring ethical protectors; personified by character, empathy, and compassion for others.
- A laser focused goal of inspiring a culture that values the physical, spiritual, and mental well-being of every member of the NYPD.
The Wounded Healer ©
My remarks continued with sharing my commentary on the wisdom from the 1979 book titled The Wounded Healer © by Henri Nouwen.
The commentary included the following excerpts (some of which are paraphrased):
- “When our wounds cease to be a source of shame, and become a source of healing, we have become wounded healers.”
- “Nobody escapes being wounded. We are all wounded people, whether physically, emotionally, mentally, or spiritually.”
- “Our service will not be perceived as authentic, unless it comes from a heart wounded by the suffering we encounter in others.”
- “The main question is not ‘How can we hide our wounds?’ so we don’t have to be embarrassed, but ‘How can we put our woundedness in the service of others?”
- “To enter into solidarity with a suffering person does not mean that we have to talk with that person about our own suffering. We must by sympathetic listeners, as speaking about our own pain is seldom helpful for someone who is in pain.”
- “A wounded healer is someone who can listen [and empathize] to a person in pain without having to speak about his or her own wounds.”
- “When we have experienced pain, we can listen with great attentiveness and compassion to another in pain without spotlighting our own wounds.”
- “Mostly, it is better not to direct a suffering person’s attention to ourselves. We have to trust that our own wounds will allow us to listen to others with our whole being. The empathetic listening leads to healing.
“On November 14, The Police Self Support Group had the honor of meeting Vincent J. Bove who represented the Police Commissioner.
“It was truly impressive and uplifting to have someone speak to us, and chat individually before and after his presentation, who supports our program and methodology.
“Vincent’s presentation focused on the wounded healer, and he encouraged us to use our experiences to help others to heal.
“We are confident that our program can serve as a national model on police helping one another. We are hopeful that with individuals like Vincent in our corner, and others who support the NYPD, we will be more effective in our dedication to assist our police family, and our communities.”
Peter Pallos, Training Coordinator (PSSG), 23 years with the group.
Confidential Chats
Before and after and before my presentation, I was humbled to have numerous one-on-one confidential encounters with attendees. It was an enlightening experience listening to their stories and concerns, and an opportunity to share my respect, encouragement, and appreciation.
It was additionally humbling to have them invite me to numerous upcoming NYPD events.
These men and woman of the NYPD are treasures. I assured them that I will continually do everything in my power to assist them.
One of these encounters was with a remarkable woman, whose story I am now privileged to share.
NYPD Detective First Grade Kathy Burke retd.
After my presentation, I had the pleasure of speaking with NYPD Detective First Grade Kathy Burke retd., an inspirational trailblazer in the department’s history.
Five days later, fascinated by Kathy’s experience, and realizing her story needs to be shared, we had a more comprehensive conversation.
Kathy was sworn in as a NYPD Policewoman in 1968, when only 1% of the NYPD was female. She joined the academy in June of that year, and was one of only ten female recruits in a class of 950.
She was initially assigned primarily to searching female corpses in all stages of decomposition. An additional responsibility was to strip search female arrestees for contraband, and to secure personal property.
In 1971, Kathy was promoted to Detective 3rd grade while in undercover, and masked during her promotion ceremony to protect her undercover role.
She was the third woman in the history of the department to have been awarded the New York City Police Department Medal of Honor.
Kathy has been a leader in the Police Self Support Group (PSSG) for 39 years, and currently its Vice President. She became a hypnotist in 1978, and then certified as a forensic and investigative hypnotist in 1982.
She is co-author of the book Detective along with Neal Hirschfeld, which was a cathartic experience for her, but also a tool to inspire others to lives of service.
The Police Self Support Group gives purpose to whatever trauma one has experienced. The group empowers you to help others, and by doing so you also bring healing to yourself.” NYPD Detective Kathy Burke, PSHG Vice President
A Lighthouse for Healing
Kathy told me on how on a hot August day in 1971, while conducting a drug investigation, she was robbed, beat-up, stabbed, and had a gun put to her head and fired.
She only survived only by the grace of God because the gun misfired.
There was a limited understanding of PTSD in the 1970’s. Yet during this time, NYPD Lt. William Ballner, who had lost a partner in a shooting when he was a detective make a profound influence on Kathy. He gave Kathy the support, encouragement, and debriefing assistance necessary for healing.
Decades later, these discerning lessons continue as Kathy has been a lighthouse of healing for countless individuals who have experienced catastrophic incidents.
“You Do Not Have to Die”
In 1984, FBI Special Agent Jim Reese shared eye-opening wisdom that had a lasting impact on Kathy.
Jim stated that “if you ever get shot, you do not have to die.”
Shortly thereafter, Kathy was in an incident where she and her partner, Police Officer Anthony Vendetti, 34-years-old, were shot. Since that incident over forty years ago, Kathy still has shrapnel in her lung. Aside from being shot, as she lay wounded on the ground, one of the three shooters kicked her mercilessly, fracturing two ribs.
Tragically, her partners wounds were fatal, and as Kathy lay there, she remembered the inspiring words of Reese, “if you ever get shot, you do not have to die.”
Kathy realized she must survive – she must get up, get to a phone (cellphones were non-existent) and tell her story.
Police Self Support Group
In 1986, Kathy was invited to a NYPD (PSSG) for officers catastrophically ill, or in line-of-duty incidents, and spent years assisting her police family.
Fast-Forward to 1995, when during the fourth trial of her shooting, there was dismissal of the trial, and acquittal of the shooter.
Kathy was horrified by the injustice, and at the attitude of one of the juror’s whom she met afterwards. The contemptuous juror derisively stated “cops get paid to die” to Kathy.
Additionally, just weeks after the trial concluded, Kathy was diagnosed with stage 3 ovarian cancer. The diagnosis led to a hysterectomy and eight months of chemotherapy.
Tragedy Leads to Recovery
Backpedal back to 1986, when Kathy met Dr. Martin Symonds, M.D. and a psychiatrist.
Dr. Symonds was a trauma specialist who influenced Kathy’s healing. He sent her to help traumatized cops heal through listening, compassion, and encouragement.
On December 2, 1994, NYPD Officer Raymond R. Cannon, Jr., 26-years-old, was shot and killed while he and his partner responded to a call to investigate a suspicious person at a bicycle shop. [1]
Shortly afterwards, the wisdom of Dr. Symonds ignited a profound epiphany in Kathy’s life.
As requested by Dr. Symonds, Kathy visited Officer Cannon’s surviving partner who was starving himself to death due to survivor’s guilt. Kathy listened to his heartbreaking story, and then showed him her wounds. Both started to cry, and at that moment his life was reclaimed and his road to recovery commenced.
This was a defining experience for Kathy. It illustrated that her wounds now had a clarity of purpose. The encounter inspired Kathy to start a 1995 Police Self Support Group, learn hypnosis for counseling, train wounded colleagues to recapture their lives, and inspire healing for individuals with numerous addictions, phobias, and catastrophic experiences.
Angels Amongst Us
Kathy understands that although a clinical approach to healing is sometimes necessary. She also believes that the non-clinical approach of sincerely listening, affirming, and encouraging has its place and is also a powerful antidote to suffering and trauma.
Currently, the NYPD PSSG is comprised of about 200 members. There are about 50 members who have had, or currently experiencing serious illnesses. The remaining 150 members have experienced line-of-duty incidents including shootings, stabbings, vehicular accidents, and assaults.
There are angels amongst us, who do the work of heaven as wounded healers. They bring hope, comfort, and healing to others. Kathy Burke is one of these angels, and in meeting her one can truly experience heavenly kindness, grace, and altruism.
NYPD Employee Assistance Unit
My next presentation, and first as newly appointed NYPD Honorary Law Enforcement Motivational Speaker occurred on Monday, November 25, 2024.
It occurred at the NYPD Academy and was titled NYPD Employee Assistance Unit: Leading Through a National Crisis ©.
The audience was the NYPD Peer Support Group, a group of police officers and detectives from precincts throughout New York City.
These admirable professionals are dedicated and trained with responding to mental health concerns of their NYPD family.
It was my honor to address them and express my admiration, support, and respect as they represent the finest of all of us.
My goal was to inspire the noble ideals of the ethical protector and wounded healer.
The qualities of empathy, compassion, and affirmation are hallmarks of their work, and they are to be commended for their dedication to supporting their colleagues.
NYPD Sergeants: Leading Through a National Crisis ©
My initiative The NYPD: Leading Through a National Crisis © continued on November 29, 2024 with my presentation to the department’s 75 newly promoted sergeants.
The presentation was titled NYPD Sergeants: Leading Through a National Crisis ©. It was scheduled at the state-of-the-art police academy in Queens, New York.
The Ethical Protector and Wounded Healer topics of my previous NYPD presentations remained. Yet for these new sergeants I also punctuated the following:
- The Honor Guard of The Tomb of the Unknown Soldier from Arlington National Cemetery, exemplars of discipline, patriotism, and honor.
- The Liberation Monument in Jersey City, NJ that powerfully depicts an American Soldier carrying a survivor from a World War II concentration camp, a model of American character.
- Dr. Conrad Baars and the transformative power of affirmation, recommended to law enforcement because of its demand to be leaders of fortitude, compassion, and character. These qualities are mandatory in a society that at times reflects emotional depravation realities.
NYPD Lieutenants and Captains: Leading Through a National Crisis ©
The initiative The NYPD: Leading Through a National Crisis © continued with my presentation to the department’s newly appointed lieutenants and captains on December 4, 2024.
NYPD Lieutenants and Captains: Leading Through a National Crisis © occurred at the police academy in Queens, New York.
We spent time identifying the reality of suicide among law enforcement. This tragic reality was emphasized by a headline from California on Nov. 7, 2023 in the Los Angeles Times:
“Four Current & former L.A. Sheriff’s Department employees died by suicide in a 24-hour span”
By honestly addressing the issue, our goal was to destigmatize suicide and mental health illness.
We defined stigma as follows:
“The negative social attitude attached to a characteristic of an individual that may be regarded as a mental, physical, or social deficiency.
“A stigma implies social disapproval and can lead unfairly to discrimination against & exclusion of the individual.” American Association of Suicidology
Normalizing mental health treatment and combating myths were noted with corrective measures identified to destigmatize suicide and mental health issues.
Final Reflections: A Tribute to Former NYPD Commissioner Thomas G. Donlon
NYPD Commissioner Thomas G. Donlon’s visionary leadership was the catalyst behind this unique initiative. Donlon also expanded the initiative through an unparalleled partnership with the FDNY Commissioner which began with a September 27, 2024 conference call with the three of us.
Next on the agenda, a first of its kind police-fire department unity of effort. This will take place at police precincts and fire houses. My focus will be unwavering support for the NYPD, FDNY and all first responders.
Ethical leadership, building morale, emotional resilience, and suicide prevention will be the pillars of my motivational remarks to our public servants.
A Note of Gratitude
- Former NYPD Commissioner Thomas G. Donlon for his visionary leadership and confidence in me.
- FDNY Fire Commissioner Robert S. Tucker, for his dedication to this partnership with Commissioner Donlon and myself.
- NYPD Executive Staff for their time during our meetings, and brainstorming an action plan for my initiative.
- Chief John Benoit, Director of Personnel for his time with Commissioner Donlon and myself, and the professionalism of his staff during my appointment processing.
- Chief Supervising Surgeon Dr. Eli Kleinman M.D. M.P.H for his time during my conference call with him and Dr. Lokesh Reddy M.D., Psychiatrist; and for his invitation for me to speak to the Police Self Support Group (PSSG) on November 14.
- Inspector Mark Wachter, Commanding Officer of the Health and Wellness Section for developing an actionable plan on my appointment for the Police Commissioner.
- PSSG Training Coordinator Peter Pallos for his admirable dedication to assisting others, and his invitation for me to speak today.
- NYPD legal matters, POPPA, the New York City Police Foundation, and many NYPD officials whom made my appointment possible.
- NYPD Assistant Chief Richie Taylor for his time during my appointment process.
- In particular, it is imperative to express my admiration for all NYPD personnel dedicated to protecting our communities, the Police Self Support Group and Peer Support Group for their inspiring commitment to helping their colleagues.
[1] https://www.odmp.org/officer/745-police-officer-raymond-r-cannon-jr
Spotlight NYPD Resource: A National Model
Mental Health Resources for NYPD Members
Related:
21st Century Policing: Issues and Response
21St Century Policing: Issues and Response
21st Century American Policing Demands Ethical Leadership
21st Century American Policing Demands Ethical Leadership
Police Suicides: Awareness, Compassion, Action
Police Suicides: Awareness, Compassion, Action
America’s Law Enforcement Sacrifices Demand Eternal Gratitude
America’s Law Enforcement Sacrifices Demand Eternal Gratitude
Igniting 21st Century Ethical Policing: Understanding the Profession
Understanding the Profession
Safeguarding America’s Protectors: A Community Responsibility
Safeguarding America’s Protectors: A Community Responsibility
NYPD Sergeants: Leading Through a National Crisis ©
http://vincentbove.blogspot.com/2024/11/nypd-sergeants-leading-through-national.html
NYPD Employee Assistance Unit: Leading Through a National Crisis ©
http://vincentbove.blogspot.com/2024/11/nypd-employee-assistance-unit-leading.html
Note Well: The National Fraternal Order of Police reports that as of midnight on Oct. 31, 2024 there have been 301 officers shot in the line of duty.
Out of the 301 officers who have been shot, 43 were killed by gunfire.
That is a 7% increase from the same period in 2023.
FOP Report: https://national.fop.net/reportshotkilled1112024#page=1
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